The High Maintenance Bitch

Understanding Silver Spoon Rich Bitches And Their High School Roots

Occasionally my editor says "watch this movie and review it" because it relates to dating and interpersonal relationships. Well, he had me watch MEAN GIRLS and now I want to kick his ass. Mean Girls script was adapted by Tina Fey of Saturday Night Live and the film was produced by Lorne Michaels of the same fame and stars Lindsey Lohan.

I could bore you with all of the normal "critic" rhetoric of this brilliant filmmaking masterpiece second only to Citizen Cane - instead I will tell why I want to kick my editors ass for making me watch it. IT PISSED ME OFF!

This film was not meant to pull on the heart strings so we could all relate to being the underdog at a new school with undeniable cliques and ridiculous social dynamics… NNNOOOOOOO. By the way - that last sentence just summed up the whole film so "smokem if ya gottem".

This film is about a smoking hot chick (Lohan) who grew up in Africa and was home schooled her whole life and is being thrown into a "real high school" for the first time. She has to deal with the normal stuff plus a group of girls called "The Plastics" - silver spoon rich bitches who are in training to be gold digger MILFs. They befriend her and try to ruin her life at the same time.

I got sucked into this movie as if I had stepped into McFly's DeLorean and gone back to the future. I must admit I did take an 11 minute intermission when I saw Lohan in a mini-skirt. I stayed focus, stayed the course and tried not to relive my own personal high school experience of pain and brutality and sexual fumblings.

You see, I was not always a stud, a heartbreaker or a Romeo. My gigolo beefcake days didn't come until a number of years of practicing and failing at seduction and my karmic tables finally took a turn. Until that time I was forced into one or more of the school cliques.

The fact of the matter - I was subject to being rejected from certain cliques because they thought I belonged to other cliques. The Hessians didn't like me because I got good grades in class and the nerds didn't like me because they saw me beat up two (2) jocks one day. I got in the fight with the jocks because they called me a pothead (I was). I was good looking but not rich so the hot rich bitches would only flirt or talk to me when no one would catch them.

Early on I was an independent rebel, a maverick that didn't understand high school dynamics and didn't want too. My sister taught me how to be smart and my brother taught me how to be tough. If people would cheat off of my tests, I would sometimes put the wrong answer until the last minute hoping they would fail. I would stick up for nerdy kids at school who could't stick up for themselves and was hated by most guys for it except the geeks I was helping. It made me stronger in the end but not any happier at the time.


Payback

Those bitches in the movie exemplify everything we hated about high school and if there's one thing to dislike about being single as adults, it's these women. Gossip, rumors, materialism, backstabbing, vengeance and worst of all game playing is the crap we bring directly from those years to adult hood. Now I am a stud, a Romeo, a pimp and don't need any cliques or approval from anyone. In addition to mastering the art of seduction, I have learned how to deal with bitchy broads who think their shit don't stink.

Categorizing these prissy bitches is easy, they are high maintenance. It is no secret that "the higher maintenance a women is the better in bed she will be". I hate to say it but that statement is the truth. High maintenance females are not just high maintenance to us but to themselves. All this work they do on their body, hair and nails is for one reason and one reason only: ATTENTION.

Attention is the one thing that most women can not live without, most especially a high maintenance bitch. So now that you know her "Achilles Heal" that is where you will punish the whore in public. When you run into any chick that reminds you of all the pussy "YOU DIDN'T GET" in high school, throw water on the fire. Finally readers, here's where you can use a 'Neg Hit' to get this woman's attention.

We've slammed the use of backhanded compliments in the past, only because many people selling seduction courses were instructing men to use backhanded compliments on all women, which doesn't work. If a backhanded compliment (aka neg hit) is going have a chance to work it's magic, it's going to be on one of these high maintenance attention seeking bitches.

Turn a compliment into a statement or innuendo:

"Wow, you decided to wear that huh? Well as long as you are comfy".

My favorite is spontaneously offering her a "breath mint" and roll your eyes if she doesn't take it. The real bomb to drop is saying something intelligent that she doesn't know and then say, "You didn't know that... humph".

Once you have established that the prissy spoiled bitch that is never going to give you sex is grabbing all the attention, then take it from her and make her feel stupid. Challenge her intelligence (easy), challenge her style (ego) and then make her feel that you would never sleep with her.

Now you know how to handle a Mean Girl or bitchy chick. My methods didn't sound very nice did they? Well neither was forcing me to relive high school to write this article.